Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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