i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
