your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
