wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Still dying that you shit outside
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
