No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
There r osticjed everywhere
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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