Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I think a kid would responsible me up
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Randomize