The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
why do cheetos always look like penises
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
