Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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