So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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