I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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