I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Randomize
