you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
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