Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Randomize
