Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
