I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
