North Korea, Best Korea!
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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