we have officially lost it.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Let's paint friendship bongs
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
