i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
Randomize
