absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
