I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
