so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
