You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize