if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
