Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
