Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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