she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
the liver wants what the liver wants
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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