Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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