it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
