You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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