your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Terrible idea I love it
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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