So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
