For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
My vagina just recognized that song.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize