your thong is hanging out like whoa
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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