I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
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