Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
