glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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