Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
her facebook's as public as her vagina
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize