Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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