I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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