Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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