This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
