God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
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