He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
