hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
