dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
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