they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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