I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
