blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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