the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
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