So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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