how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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