Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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